HOME | NEWS | REDIFF DIARY	Vivek Mukherjee

A racquetball court, in-built alarm system, tennis courts, cinema room, free video library. Do not forget the two months off on rent. And the cookies and juice for prospective renters to chow on while they compare it with another offering and go, "Honey, they have the garden tub in the bathroom here, I like it better" and "Don't you think this furnishing is cute?" Unlimited parking space, microwave with the unit, washer-dryer, no application fee, no deposit, and no stupid Internet credit check, which would reject people with a three-year credit history based on stringent business rules. Dying to know where such a fantastical destination exists in the United States? Wait, I think I forgot to mention the rental per month is $600. This is Cary, North Carolina: favourable demographics, upscale, veritable yuppieland, low crime rate and, well, 'cheap' apartments! Well, at least my girlfriend lives there. Now consider this. A dingy room fitted with an escritoire and a crappy lamp is the rental office. Minimalist, Japanese-type décor. No problem. But a 300-pound she-rhino's what-the-****-do-you-want gaze almost shoos me away. And she goes, "Get a $200 money order for deposit, 75 dollar non-refundable application fee, put up your own blinds, creaky floor, no microwave, no washer-dryer hook-ups even, shower that turns cold precisely after you have lathered the soap over your eyes (at least I am out of the bathroom quick), AC only in one room..." I live here now. Yes, in this dump. This is Somerset, New Jersey. Just like Edison, Piscataway in the vicinage. Now, why am I living here? Reason: New York. And NO, I don't watch out for the low-flying objects, as I am usually busy dodging the murderous screamers on the road. Garden State has the highest density of population in the US, FYI. You probably think I love the three-and-a-half hour commute to and from work every day. Ha! But, hey, maybe I do -- conditioning is a very persuasive thing. So often now, I find myself reconciling to the fact that I have a disciplined life. I wake up at 6am and go to bed at 10pm. Or at least I try to. I live in the Real World. Not like Deb, who lives in Lego Land, Cary, North Carolina. The South, I remonstrate, is an intoxicating concoction of cornfields, mounds of mashed potatoes, afternoon snooze, 9to5er PHDs and working to devise wicked credit check policies for EquiFax and Trans Union to run on the Internet. She goes, "Puhlease, you are just jealous!" Am I? Vivek Mukherjee has no plans of shifting from Somerset in the near future. Illustration: Lynette Menezes Tell us what you think of this diary Be part of an exciting venture! Write a Diary!

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