Er, is it Dishqooo or Dakkan? A war exercise in the high seas has its own humorous moments. When a message concerning the French destroyer Duquesne reached a certain Indian naval ship, the radio operator who received it announced solemnly: "The French ship Dishqooo has arrived." "It is not Dishqooo," corrected a colleague, "It is Dakkan." Officers too were not sure how to pronounce the deceptive French name. So each preferred to have his own version. Thus, the poor vessel came to be called everything from 'Duqeeene' to 'Dakine.' The correct pronunciation remained a mystery even after the foreign ship left the Indian Ocean. On a naval frigate, with strict rules and little room to move around, life is not as much fun as it is in an aircraft carrier. There isn't much in the way of diversion, you see. At the officers' ante room, there is a VCR and some cassettes, most of them pirated. They keep watching the same movies in between tea, coffee and cold drinks; there is a strict no to booze while sailing. Of course, there are some who try to liven up things. The naval doctor whom we met in one of the ships was one such. He has started a massive campaign about HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. Huge posters hang all over the ship about these deadly diseases. Outside his clinic there's a packet of condoms, into which anyone is free to dig in. "When the ship hits a port 30 to 40 condoms disappear everyday," he says. Which could be why his ship has never reported any STD in several years now. Bathrooms are where the small ships cut all men down to size. Most officers are forced to share the common bathroom where there is hardly any space to move. One has to learn to shave, bath etc in tandem with the rolling of the ship. Must mention about the captain's life. Poor man, he really has it tough. He has to sit in the control room for hours on end, watching out for any eventuality. Hardly does he get time for sleep. Last summer when an Indian frigate was sailing from Cochin as relaxed as you please, suddenly there was a message from Bombay. It had to rush into the high seas to provide medical assistance to a passenger on a merchant vessel -- and gone was the captain's plan to take it nice and easy. "These things keep on happening. Sometimes they are hapless fishermen who get caught in the wind," says a seasoned officer. We flew in a Sea King helicopter of the Indian Navy from the French aircraft carrier P A Foch into an Indian frigate and were received warmly by senior officers. It was from here that we witnessed the war exercise (that's another story, which you can read by clicking here). As we were leaving the ship at Bombay, a senior official came up to us. "Please don't mention the name of the ship, or make any remarks that can give away the identity," he said. "We don't have permission for that. Hope you understand..." Of course, we do -- we haven't mentioned any names, have we? When he is not at sea, Josy Joseph loves to file stories on the Indian Army.
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